爱是永无止息 | Till death do us part

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“ 

I know we will have a wonderful life together

as our love will walk through eternity.

我相信与你终将旷日持久，

于是才敢说一句来日方长。

”

This love story is difficult, but it’s real. 

这是一个人和另一个人相守了一辈子的故事，

也许这个人就是你的祖辈、你的父辈，也或许，就是你。

Rao Pingru was born to an educated family in 1922. 

Mao Meitang was three years younger than Rao, sweet and innocent. 

He encountered her when he was 11 years old.

1922年，饶平如出生于江西南城的一个书香门第。

第一次见到美棠时，他11岁，她8岁。

Pingru showed his toys to Meitang at their first meeting 

平如给她摆弄自己新买的玩具

The families had a very good relationship. 

So they met for a second time. 

Gradually, Pingru grew tall and handsome, while Meitang blossomed into a beautiful girl. 

At 26, Pingru graduated from the country’s top military academy. 

When returned, he met Meitang for the third time. 

And they fell in love. 

因为父辈至交的缘故，他们又有了一面之缘。

第三次，见面时，便定下了终身之盟。

那年，饶平如26岁，刚从黄埔军校毕业，在湘西战役中好不容易捡回一条命。

家人给他介绍过两个女孩子，他都没有留意，直到在伯父家中遇到美棠。

“ 

I saw, through an open window of the house, 

a girl holding a mirror and applying lipstick. 

Was it love at first sight? Maybe…I was very much impressed. 

Later, we were engaged when her father put a ring with my name on her finger. 

我看到左边的厢房开着窗户。

有一个女孩子，20来岁的样子，拿着镜子在擦口红。

我心里一看，这个女孩子蛮好看的。

也许是一见钟情吧，反正我心里对她的印象很好。

后来，我父亲把一个写有我名字的戒指交给她父亲了。

美棠坐在床边，她父亲就把戒指往她手上一戴，就戴上了。

”

Meitang was holding a mirror and applying lipstick

美棠在窗前借天光揽镜自照

They were married in 1948. 

1948年，饶平如和毛美棠结为夫妻。

Wedding photo

结婚照

“ 

Before I met her,

I feared nothing, not even death.

After the marriage, however, 

I had to take our future seriously.

在遇到她以前，

我不怕死，

不惧远行。

也不曾忧虑悠长岁月，

现在却从未如此真切过地思虑起将来。

”

"Many say marriage is the tomb of love. But I'd argue the opposite. I think marriage is the cradle of love." 

“很多人讲，婚姻是爱情的坟墓。而我讲，恰恰相反。婚姻是爱情的开始。”

他们住在亭子改造的房子里，一起听风声雨声雷声，声声惊动，却被平如形容成“山间的诗意”。

“不管什么时候，什么地域，什么人生，有些诗意的人，他看什么都是有诗意的。”

The couple enjoyed the moon in a shabby house 

看得见月光的房间

Like any couple, happiness mixed up with bickering in their daily lives. 

“We had a fight. But only one. I can’t remember it clearly, I just know I was so angry that I crashed a red thermos on a table. She cried loudly while turning her face to the wall. We didn’t talk for one hour. I came to hug her and she turned to me, giggling in my arms.”

恩爱夫妻，也免不了有拌嘴的时候。

“吵也吵过一次，就是Only one。结婚之后半年不到，两个人住在南昌，我想不起来什么事情，太不讲理了，气，我就去拿小桌子上的热水瓶，红的，拿起来一丢，她就呜呜呜，哭了，面向墙壁哭起来。我们都不讲话，1个小时还不到，我气平了一点，我就去拉她，她转过来就嘿嘿嘿笑起来，她是吓我的。”

A fight with Meitang

和美棠的一次小争吵

“If I remarried, I couldn’t find a woman better than her. There are some people who would leave their beloved ones during the hardship. But Meitang, even in the toughest times, never left me.”

“我如果再找，未必能再找到一个她这样的。她对我的帮助很大，没有她的支持，我没有今天。因为最艰苦的时候，很多人都妻离子散了，就不管你了。”平如回忆道。

The couple were forced apart amid social turmoil in 1958 when Pingru was sent for the reeducation through labor at a camp in Anhui Province. 

For 22 years, Pingru was allowed to visit his family only once a year. 

To raise their five kids and support the family, Meitang had to work, carrying heavy bags on the construction site. 

1958年，饶平如被送到安徽劳教。

一走就是22年，每年只能回来一趟，直到1979年。

生活急转直下。家中的重担全落在美棠身上。

旗袍卷发变成了蓝布衣齐耳发，跳舞看电影变成了想尽办法补贴家用，照顾五个孩子。

Rao Pingru was in a reeducation-through-labor camp

平如在安徽工厂劳动改造

Meitang was working on the construction site of Shanghai Natural History Museum

美棠为了补贴家用，在上海自然博物馆工地上搬水泥

Pingru received fish oil from Meitang during his sickness 

平如生病水肿，收到美棠寄来的“乳白鱼肝油”

Meitang saved half a cube of sugar from their kids and sent it to Pingru.

Pingru refused to eat the sugar and placed it beneath his pillow. 

Now, whenever he walks to the Shanghai Natural History Museum, Pingru pauses as he knows he is stepping on the stones that Meitang carried before. 

“Her body was not strong but her will was. She was a good wife and a good mother, a great woman with China’s traditional virtues,” Pingru recalled.

美棠从孩子口中省下半包糖块就寄给平如，他都拿手绢包着放枕头下，能够吃整整半月。

及至后来他回到上海，每次经过上海自然博物馆，都停一停，

因为他知道脚下的台阶里不知哪一块就是美棠背过的水泥。

“她是一个有中华传统美德的，一个很坚强的女性，简单说，贤妻良母。”

In 1979, Rao Pingru finally returned home, only to find out that Meitang had been diagnosed with diabetes and nephrosis. 

Meitang began to lose her memory. 

So Pingru quit his job and looked after her. 

好容易最后又在一起了，美棠却身患重病且渐渐失去记忆。

平如推掉了所有工作，全身心照顾妻子。

“Get a knife for me! I need to cut the quilt smaller!”

“去拿把剪刀来！我要把这被子剪小一点！”

Meitang urges Pingru “do not eat unhealthily” even when she was heavily ill

美棠病里渐渐糊涂，却仍不忘叮嘱平如“你不要乱吃东西啊！”

One day, Meitang said she wanted to have some of her favorite desserts. 

Pingru brought them back after 40 minutes’ ride in the chilly winter. 

But when he arrived home, Meitang couldn’t remember asking for the treats. 

All of a sudden, despair struck Pingru down. 

He fell to the ground and wailed.

有一次，美棠突然说想吃杏花楼的点心，平如就冒着严寒骑了40分钟自行车给她买来，买回来的时候，她已经忘了，也不想吃了。

最绝望的时候，八十多岁的饶平如，跌在地上，嚎啕大哭。

In 2008, Meitang died with a final tear hanging in her eyes

2008年，平如送美棠最后一程，看着她流尽最后一滴泪

“ 

同生死，

共患难，

以沫相濡，

天若有情天亦老；

三载隔幽冥，

绝音问，

愁肠寸断，

相思始觉海非深。

”

After Meitang died, Pingru placed her ashes in his bedroom, waiting for the day they could be buried together. 

Meitang left the world, but their love story lives on. 

At 87, Rao Pingru started painting to document those precious moments with his wife, compiling an 18-volume memoir. 

美棠走后，他将美棠的骨灰放在卧室里，要等自己离世后和美棠安葬在一起。

少年夫妻，结发携手。既然无法再相守，饶平如选择永不忘记。

87岁学画画，用3年的时间，手绘18本画册，一笔一画还原两人在一起的点点滴滴。

“ 

如今生死两茫茫，

不思量，

自难忘。

手握柔毫，

纸上画凄凉。

”

He still remembers Meitang loved the song “Rose and Mary.”

So he started playing this song on the piano at 90, as if Meitang were listening.

他还记得美棠最爱听《罗斯玛丽》，他90岁才学钢琴，就为弹这支曲子，虽然她已经听不见了。

Rao Pingru was singing the love song ‘Rose and Mary’ to Meitang at the park

我在公园里高唱爱情歌曲

For what is love?

爱是什么？

He shared what he wrote on one of his paintings:

他慢慢打开画册，翻出抄录自《圣经》中的一句：

“ 

Love is patient. 

Love is kind.

…

It bears all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 

Love never ends.

爱是恒久忍耐。

爱是仁慈。

…

凡事包容，凡事相信，凡事盼望，凡事忍耐。

爱是永不止息。

”

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